USP - Day 24

Here is a comforting thought from my therapist:

People don’t really care about you as much as you think they do.

I’m codependent, extroverted, and probably a narcissist. The only concept that frees me from my obsession with what others think of me, is that of others not really thinking about me much at all.

With it, I’m able to laugh in the face of my anxieties. Every time I over-analyze my actions, dissecting how they’re received, the rational part of my brain can scoff at my narcissism. Ridiculous to believe that people with little presence in my life have more than fleeting thoughts about me.

Of course, it’s not like it eases my mind to think that no one gives a shit. But I know that there are a lot of people who love me, and think about me often, and I care about their opinions and judgements.

But the anxiety comes from the fear of someone judging my entire character based on a single facet.

Now I can remind myself that even if they think I’m a truly horrific excuse for a woman, they probably don’t really think about me much at all. And that is freeing to believe.

So, if any of you out there are sworn enemies, obsessing over my demise every minute from your KP shrine room, please let me know so I can focus all of my anxieties upon you and have a breakdown trying to make you my friend.

Nonfiction, WordsTeeth